…..obviously there are reasons why we are friends.
Her nail polish was chipped and
her eyes glazed.
Her ears ringing, her head singing, her heart clinging
to non-existant beings, sitting well-behaved
according to vacant plans.
You can’t control when your life changes forever. When life as you know it will never again be “life as you know it”. It’s absolutely terrifying.
People that I’ve known for so long, since I was five or six years old, people that I’m not particularly close with, but that I still consider my close friends; they’re leaving. They’re going away, graduating from childhood to adulthood, and it will be odd knowing that these people might be across the country instead of across the hallway, like they’ve always been.
All I can think is; I’m next. One more year and then it’s my turn. I’ll be facing my last year in this familiar place. I’ll be saying last goodbyes to people that I’ve known since kindergarten; people that I grew up with. I’ll end up being a twenty-something-year-old, and I’ll hear that my former classmate is famous, or published a book, or was in a car crash, or they are getting married. It’ll bring back the most nostalgic memories of how I loved them, or how I loathed them.
It’s not the fact of if you loved these people or not, it’s the fact that they’re a part of your life, no matter how you feel about them. Everyone influences you, and it’s impossible to change it. I know that some of the girls in my school have made me a Type A, sadistic, control freak, but that’s okay. It’s just a part of who I am.
The thing is, when life changes forever, there’s no going back. Relationships are going to change, friendships, bonds… It’s all just a big game until it ends. Until it’s your turn, you’re just a pawn. Soon you’ll be knocked off the board, and you’ll be left to fend for yourself.
It’s excitingly scary and horrifyingly thrilling to think that soon it’s my turn to go out and start my own life. But then university exams come into play…
Sometimes lies are automatic. You can’t think it through until after it’s escaped your lips, and only then you realize how stupid the lie was.
How it was just a little lie about something perfectly simple, and the truth wouldn’t have gotten you in trouble, but reality is always worse than the little fantasy you live in. Always.
Have any of you seen The Baby Borrowers? It’s pretty cool.
It’s like, teenage couples who think that they’re ready to have kids are given their own houses for a period of time, and then families let them take care of their babies for a few days, and then they keep moving up. After babies, they get toddlers, then pre-teens, then teens, and then elderly people.
Idk, it’s just a pretty good reality show.